For It's Late and the Moon is High
by samuraiheart
Summary: NOW COMPLETE *shounen-ai* Touya and Yukito find that love isn't easy - especially between friends. Spoilers for all of the manga.
1. Chapter One: The Best Laid Plans

Title: For It's Late and the Moon is High  
Author: samuraiheart  
Email: kokoro_no_samurai@yahoo.com  
Pairing: Touya/Yukito  
Warnings: shounen-ai, m/m   
SPOILERS for all of the manga  
Archive: Clamp Fan Fiction Archive - yes, others ask  
Summary: Touya and Yukito find that love isn't easy - especially between friends  
Disclaimer: Card Captor Sakura belongs to Clamp - not me.  
  
Chapter One: The Best Laid Plans  
  
"Ne, Yuki, do you want to go get a snack or something?" Touya asked hesitantly. He was more nervous than he cared to admit. Today was the day he had decided to finally confess his feelings for Yukito.   
  
Yukito grinned at the suggestion, warm brown eyes brightening into an almost rapturous gaze. "Hai, To-ya, that would be great! I know a great coffee shop near the library!"  
  
Touya let out a soft sigh of relief. At least that part was over with - not that he had really expected Yukito to say no. He couldn't even remember the last time his friend had turned down food of any kind.  
  
The two friends walked silently in the direction of the coffee shop. That in itself was not unusual since Touya was not generally a talkative person, but this silence was not the comfortable quiet that often settled over the two friends. This silence was taut with nervousness and hesitation. It stretched in the space between them like a string pulled just a bit too far.  
  
Touya trudged on at Yukito's side, as the light-haired young man seemed to skip along completely oblivious to Touya's apprehension.  
  
Touya shook his head slightly at the site and his lips curved upwards in a ghost of a smile. It was just one of the many things he loved about Yukito. He only hoped his friend would return his feelings. He could never really tell how Yukito felt about him. He felt sure that there was something more than friendship between the two of them, but he wasn't certain that Yukito would name it love.  
  
Touya had come to his own conclusion after many sleepless nights and shy glances in Yukito's direction during study sessions. He had no doubt that this feeling was called love and he wanted nothing more than to wrap Yukito in his arms and announce his devotion with a long, slow kiss in front of the whole town, but he knew that probably wasn't the best idea.  
  
Instead he had decided that he would take his friend out for a snack after school and break the news to him sometime between bites of a sugary confection of his choosing preferably somewhere quiet and secluded.  
  
He had tried not to think about what would happen if Yukito said no in the hopes that if he never considered it then it wouldn't even be an option, but at least this plan would allow him to escape without causing too much of a commotion if such action became necessary. It would also give him the opportunity for that kiss if things went well.  
  
Touya felt his cheeks burn at the thought and he nearly missed the door to the coffee shop as Yukito shot him a confused look and gestured to the glass door with a cheerful sign welcoming customers to "Stop in and try our muffins."  
  
"Come on, To-ya. It's right here."  
  
"Right." Touya answered nodding at his friend and holding the door open as Yukito stepped inside and grinned at the woman behind the counter as if they were old friends. Touya started to wonder how many times Yukito had visited this particular coffee shop, but waved the thought aside as Yukito placed his order.  
  
"Do you want anything, To-ya?" Yukito asked innocently after ordering enough sweets for half a dozen people at least.  
  
"No thanks." Touya answered shaking his head. Yukito shrugged his shoulders and turned back towards the counter to wait for his food.  
  
Touya couldn't seem to catch his breath. He was definitely more nervous than he thought he would be. He clenched and unclenched his hands at his sides several times and tried to take slow even breaths in an attempt to calm himself. The nervousness made itself known in the form of butterflies dancing in his stomach adding to his general feeling of uneasiness. He was sure that he looked a mess, but he decided that he didn't care. Soon this would all be over and then he could deal with the consequences. Waiting was the worst part and he felt fairly sure that even rejection couldn't possibly feel any worse than this constant feeling of uncertainty.  
  
Touya swallowed thickly at the prospect of rejection. No matter what he told himself he knew that that would be a heavy blow. He tried not to think about such things as Yukito thanked the cashier and picked up a large paper sack full of pastries and turned towards Touya with a wide grin gracing his lips.  
  
"Okay, Touya, where do you want to eat?" Yukito asked cheerfully taking a bite of a frosted piece of cake.  
  
Touya blinked back at his friend and suddenly found it very difficult to put two words together let alone form a coherent thought. "Ano…"  
  
"To-ya?" Yukito asked once more this time his voice was laced with concern and he raised one eyebrow in confusion.  
  
"Outside." Touya answered decisively.  
  
Yukito nodded at the sentiment and followed Touya out the door and down the sidewalk towards a tree lined section of the nearby park. It was spring and the cherry blossoms were just beginning to bloom. Small pink buds dotted the dark branches of several trees and rustled softly in the cool breeze sweeping across them. Sunlight streamed across the landscape highlighting brilliant colors of the setting and casting contrasting shadows across the pavement before them.  
  
They found an empty park bench and sat down together. Yukito continued nibbling at his desserts while Touya sat quietly examining his hands folded in his lap and trying to think of a good way to open the conversation.  
  
"To-ya, is everything okay?" Yukito turned towards his friend with a worried expression on his face. His eyes were wide with uncertainty as he peered at Touya's slumped shoulders and fidgeting hands.  
  
"Yeah." Touya answered in a voice just above a whisper. He lifted his gaze meeting Yukito's troubled expression with solemn blue eyes shimmering with emotion. He bit his lip and swallowed resolutely, deciding that it would be best if he just came right out and said it. He couldn't avoid the subject any longer. "Yuki, there's something I have to tell you."  
  
Touya's voice was hushed and wavered slightly as he shifted his gaze away from Yukito's eyes and focused on a spot just over his shoulder. Yukito's bag of sweets sat forgotten by his side as he leaned closer waiting to hear whatever it was that was making Touya so nervous.  
  
Touya glanced down at his hands and let the words spill from his lips in quick succession before he could reconsider. "I love you."  
  
The sincere words seemed to echo in the space between them as Yukito's eyes widened and his lips parted slightly as if to respond. He closed them just as quickly and stared back at his friend in silence.  
  
The world around them seemed to fade from existence as Touya gained a little more confidence and continued. "I care about you very much, Yuki. I always have. I would do anything for you and I need you more than you will ever know. I love you." Touya shrugged at the last words and turned towards Yukito with a hint of a smile on his face. He froze at the look Yukito gave him. His friend stared back at him with an expression somewhere between surprise and alarm. Yukito's wide brown eyes flickered with disbelief and he sat with both shoulders leaning away from his friend as if he wanted to get away as quickly as possible.  
  
Touya's smile faded as Yukito looked down at the gap on the bench between them and frowned. He strained to hear Yukito's words amidst the oppressive silence that seemed to have settled over the pair, nerves stretched to the breaking point and his heart still beating quickly in his chest.  
  
"I'm sorry, To-ya." Yukito couldn't bring himself to look up at his friend as he spoke the words. "I don't feel the same way."  
  
Yukito turned to retrieve his coffee shop purchases as he stood up and walked quickly away from the dark-haired young man still sitting on the park bench trying to desperately to understand what had just taken place.  
  
Touya watched Yukito until he disappeared around the corner and then his shoulders slumped dejectedly and he closed his eyes in an effort to push away the ache in his chest as Yukito's words repeated over and over in his head. He took in a slow shuddering breath and brought both hands up to cover his eyes as he buried his head in them and tried to suppress the feelings of panic and despair swimming within his soul. He had never planned on this. He wasn't sure why, but he had been almost certain that Yukito would return his affections. He never expected to be turned down and he was completely unprepared for the consequences. He bent his head in shame and sorrow as sobs bubbled up in his throat and escaped through barely parted lips. Tears lingered at the edges of his gaze and gathered on dark lashes as he wiped them away before they could fall down his pale cheeks.  
  
He felt as if his world had shattered in the space of a few moments. He had no idea what to do next and dreaded the thought of days and weeks passing as he struggled to overcome this horrible sense of loneliness. He never thought he would feel this way again after he had found Yukito. His friend had brought warmth and comfort into his life like he had never known before and now it was gone. It was over and he had ruined it all with just a few simple words on a sunny afternoon.  
  
TBC  
  
  
Notes: This takes place some time not too long after Sakura's confession to Yukito and so everything that Yukito said to Sakura during that conversation really did happen. In other words, this WILL have a happy ending. It just might take me a while to get there ::sweatdrop:: Thanks for reading so far!  
  
I should have the next part out soon!  
  
Bonus points for anyone who can identify the source of the title. Maybe I'll tell you at the end ^_^ 


	2. Chapter Two: A Dreary Evening

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See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such  
  
Chapter Two: A Dreary Evening  
  
Fujitaka frowned as he finished up the last couple of dishes from dinner and glanced at the clock hanging on the kitchen wall. It was nearly 9:30 and well past the time when Touya should have been home. He had held off dinner for as long as he could, reassuring Sakura that her brother was fine and had probably just forgotten to call to tell them he had other plans. She had nodded in agreement and Fujitaka had tried his best to smile at the sentiment, but he was more worried than he wanted to let on. This wasn't like Touya at all to be so late with no word. The white board clearly indicated that Touya had no practice after school and no part-time job to attend to today. Fujitaka knew that his son often spent the afternoon with his best friend Yukito, but he was always home by dinner if he had no other plans.  
  
He wouldn't have been quite so worried if it wasn't for the heavy thunder and lighting of a spring downpour outside. He could hear the wind whistling through the trees and the sound of raindrops pounding against the roof and windows. It was a nasty storm to say the least and he hated to think of the prospect of his son somewhere out there in the midst of it.  
  
With a heavy sigh Fujitaka wiped the last dish with a towel and set it aside to dry. He supposed that he should call Yukito's house to see if Touya was there before he worried too much.  
  
He dialed the number quickly and waited for several rings before he heard the sound of Yukito on the other line.  
  
"Hello, Tsukishiro Yukito speaking."  
  
"Hi, Tsukishiro-kun. This is Kinomoto Fujitaka. Is Touya there with you?"  
  
"No he's not. I haven't seen him since this afternoon."  
  
"Hmmm… Okay, thanks."  
  
"He's still not home?"  
  
"No. Do you have any idea where he might be?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Well, I'm going to go look for him. Thanks for your help."  
  
"I'm sure he's fine."  
  
"I hope so."  
  
"Bye."  
  
"Goodbye."  
  
Fujitaka climbed the stairs and knocked on Sakura's door.  
  
Sakura opened the door and peered out into the hallway before opening it all the way and inviting her father inside.  
  
"Sakura-san, I'm going to go look for your brother. You stay here in case he comes back before I do, okay?"  
  
Sakura nodded and then looked up at him with concern. "Do you think he's alright?"  
  
Fujitaka forced a smile and patted his daughter on the head affectionately. "I'm sure he's fine and I know that he wouldn't want you to worry about him no matter what."  
  
"Alright."  
  
"Now you should probably get to bed so you get plenty of rest for school tomorrow."  
  
"Okay. Goodnight, Otousan."  
  
"Good night, Sakura-san."  
  
Fujitaka grabbed an umbrella from the bin by the door and slipped on a long brown rain coat on the way out the door.  
  
He drove slowly up and down the streets of the neighborhood searching for some sign of Touya along the way, but his car headlights only illuminated empty streets. No one seemed to be venturing out in such a torrential downpour besides him.  
  
Half an hour later, Fujitaka was just about to give up when he spotted a shadowy figure wandering slowly down the sidewalk a few feet away. He squinted in that direction and tried to make out the identity of the person, but couldn't see much beyond the raindrops smearing his windshield.  
  
As he watched, the dark figure stepped within the circle of a streetlight and Fujitaka caught a glimpse of dark hair and a familiar blue shirt. He parked the car quickly and ran towards the young man shielding himself from the strong gusts of wind. Opening the umbrella he offered it to his son as he came closer.  
  
"Touya-kun! I've been looking everywhere for you! What happened?" Fujitaka shouted against the sound of the storm.  
  
Touya stared up at his father with a blank expression on his face and Fujitaka gasped at the starkness in his deep blue eyes. Not waiting for a response and not really expecting one, Fujitaka wrapped one arm around Touya's shoulder and led his son towards the waiting car. He opened the door and guided Touya into the seat before closing it and getting in on the other side.  
  
"We should get you home. You must be freezing." Fujitaka said after pulling away from the curb.  
  
Touya said nothing in response, but Fujitaka could feel him shivering next to him. He frowned at that and glanced over at his son. Touya sat huddled up against the far side of the car, left shoulder pressed up against the door with his arms wrapped around himself. He hadn't said a word since Fujitaka had found him and he still looked lost. His eyes were red as if he had been crying, but Fujitaka couldn't be certain since raindrops would have long since mingled with any remaining tear streaks that might have graced his face. His dark hair was dripping wet and his bangs pressed against his forehead in sharp contrast to his too pale skin. His light blue shirt clung to his skin soaked to every fiber with rainwater.  
  
Once they arrived home, Fujitaka guided Touya into the house hesitantly. Secretly glad to see Sakura's light off since the sight of Touya was disturbing him and he didn't want to upset Sakura.  
  
"You need to get out of those wet clothes and take a warm bath. Why don't you go do that and I'll heat up something for you to eat?"  
  
"I'm not hungry." Touya answered flatly. "I'll just go to bed after the bath."  
  
Fujitaka stared after his son with concern as he watched the young man climb the stairs slowly and head off towards the bathroom.  
  
He frowned and followed shortly afterwards. Fujitaka waited on the edge of his bed trying to decide if he should go check up on his son. He didn't want to interfere too much, but he couldn't help but be worried. He stood up suddenly at the sound of the bathroom door being opened and the steady sound of footsteps making their way down the hall to Touya's room.  
  
Fujitaka peered into the hallway and called after his son. "Do you need anything, Touya-kun?"  
  
Touya shook his head and stepped into his room. Fujitaka rushed over and propped the door open with one hand just before Touya could close it. "Are you alright, Touya-kun?"  
  
"I'm fine. Goodnight."  
  
"Wait. What happened?"  
  
Touya hesitated for a long moment looking down at the floor, but he clamped down any signs that he might be willing to share such information. "Nothing." He answered simply.  
  
The older Kinomoto let his arms fall to his sides as his son pushed the door closed. Fujitaka stared at it not knowing what to do. He knew that whatever it was he would have to respect his son's decision to keep it secret for the moment no matter how much he wanted to find out what was troubling him. He couldn't even begin to imagine what might have happened to make Touya so upset, but his son had always been quiet when he was distressed. He hoped that Touya wouldn't hold his pain in too long and might confide in him or his sister when he was feeling more up to it.   
  
TBC  
  
Notes: Thanks to everyone who has commented! I really love to hear feedback ^_^ I don't know how long this fic is going to be so 10 parts is just a guess. It might be less than that, but I don't think that it will be more. I'm in the middle of exams here so the next few parts might be a little slow in coming, but I'll make up for it afterwards.  
  
I've never really written Fujitaka before so I wasn't sure what he would do. I kind of wanted him to just give Touya a big hug at the end, but that didn't seem like it really fit. Don't you just want to give Touya a big hug right now? Just wait. Pretty soon you'll want to give Yuki one too I think, but that's a few chapters away. Ah, the suspense…  
  
Yes, I'm rambling, but you're still reading. I'm still trying to decide when to send the next chapter out. It's finished though so I'll probably post it pretty soon. I want to see what people think of this one first.  
  
Oh yeah, and the chapter titles will only get cheesier...  
  
Thanks! 


	3. Chapter Three: More Than Words

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Here's the next part. I feel like being nice tonight and sending out two parts. I'll dedicate this part to Cassima for being so wonderful and supportive ^_^  
  
See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such  
  
Chapter Three: More Than Words…  
  
Touya opened his eyes reluctantly at the sound of his alarm the next morning. He switched it off quickly and pulled the covers over his head as he drifted back into an uneasy sleep. Thoughts of yesterday swirled around within his consciousness along with a growing concern that something wasn't right. He pulled his covers closer to him and found himself shivering despite the warm flush of his cheek pressed against his pillow. A dull ache throbbed behind his eyes and wavered between a sharper pain and a feeling of detachment from the world around him. He found it difficult to open his eyes a second time at the sound of someone knocking at his door.  
  
He peered up at the intruder warily not sure who or what to expect. He had the distinct feeling that he was supposed to wake up in order to do something, but he couldn't quite recall what it was. None of those worries seemed to compare to the weariness tugging at his consciousness and the warm prospect of staying in bed.  
  
Sakura knocked on Touya's door once more, but still received no answer. She hesitantly cracked the door open and poked her head in to see if Touya was awake yet. He didn't have much time before they would have to leave for school and if he didn't hurry he would be late.  
  
"Oniichan?" Sakura asked tentatively wide green eyes searching the room. She frowned at the site of Touya still in bed. "You'll be late if you don't hurry." She couldn't begin to count the number of times she had waited for an opportunity like this. Touya was the one getting up late and not her and now she had the chance to pester him about it just as he always did to her, but there was something about the look on his face as he lifted his head to stare up at her that made her hold her tongue. She just couldn't bring herself to do it. Her father had mentioned that he was upset about something last night, but even that warning hadn't prepared her for the lost expression on his face or his blue eyes wide with uncertainty. She took a few steps forward and bent closer to him to assess the situation. She frowned at the sound of his breathing - harsh and labored as if he was having difficulty getting enough air. She pressed the back of her hand to his forehead only to find it warm to the touch.  
  
"I'll go get Otousan." Sakura assured Touya as she turned away from him and headed back down the stairs.  
  
Touya drifted somewhere between reality and a kind of half-dream where scenes of the last few days played out in the background just beyond his reach. He heard his sister's words, but he couldn't seem to attach a meaning to the syllables. Such things would take more effort and concentration than he could currently muster. At the moment he was finding it difficult just to breath in and out and keep himself from fading away into unconsciousness.  
  
He caught a faint whiff of breakfast from downstairs and turned over to bury his head further in the pillow at the mere suggestion of food. His stomach flip flopped and he was thankful that he hadn't eaten anything since yesterday afternoon. He clutched the folds of his blanket until the sensation passed.  
  
He couldn't decide if he was warm or cold, but he seemed to feel better as long as he laid perfectly still. He stared straight ahead at the ceiling and swallowed with difficulty - his scratchy throat making it painful. Everything ached in one way or another.  
  
Touya turned his head at the sound of footsteps near his door. He winced as the movement aggravated his headache and he heard a slight ringing in his ears. He glanced at his father through bleary eyes as the older man bent closer to him his face etched with concern.  
  
Fujitaka brushed his hand across Touya's burning forehead and shook his head in concern. "You're not going to school today, Touya-kun. Just lie back and get some rest."  
  
He frowned as Touya closed his eyes and mumbled something incoherent in return before drifting off into a restless sleep.   
  
Fujitaka pulled Touya's blanket closer to his son's shoulders and straightened his pillow behind his head.  
  
An hour later, Fujitaka came back upstairs to check on him before heading off to work. He piled another layer of covers over Touya's still shivering form and brushed his dark bangs away from his pale face. Touya's cheeks glowed faintly crimson in the dim light of the room and his half parted lips whispered half formed syllables as he struggled within the confines of some fever-induced nightmare.  
  
Fujitaka shook him slightly until blue eyes dimmed by sleep and exhaustion stared back at him in confusion. "Touya-kun?"  
  
Touya struggled to lift his head and pull himself into a sitting position, but Fujitaka pushed him back onto the bed and shook his head. "It's okay, Touya. You don't need to get up. Just go back to sleep. I have to go to work now, but call me right away if you need anything, okay?"  
  
Touya nodded weakly in response barely able to keep his eyes open for the space of a few minutes. "Okay, 'tousan." He answered hoarsely.  
  
Fujitaka's expression softened and he smiled at his son squeezing his hand briefly before turning to leave. "Goodbye."  
  
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Sakura fastened her rollerblades to her feet and strapped on her knee and elbow pads while sitting on the steps just outside of her school. She wanted to get home as soon as possible so she could look after her brother and make sure everything was alright.  
  
She smiled and waved at Yukito just a few feet away. He was walking slowly with his head slightly bent, but when he turned around to see Sakura he seemed to brighten up and smiled cheerfully at her in response. She wondered briefly why she hadn't seen him this morning on her way to school, but shrugged it off as she sped up to reach him.  
  
"Hi Sakura-chan!" Yukito answered as she caught up to him and started skating at his side.  
  
"Hi Yukito-san! Do you want to come home with me? Onnichan's sick and I'm sure he'd be really happy to see you."  
  
Yukito's smile faded for just a moment and his eyes seemed to lose some of their sparkle during that instant, but his cheerfulness returned just as quickly. "I don't think so, Sakura-chan." Yukito answered trying his best to sound convincing without giving away that he thought Touya wouldn't want to see him because of what had happened yesterday.  
  
"Please, Yukito-san! He's got a fever and everything and I just know he would get better if you were there." Sakura balled her fists in front of her in determination and started up at Yukito with bright eyes.  
  
Yukito shrugged slightly and smiled once again. "Alright. If you insist." He said trying to keep the hesitation out of his voice.  
  
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Once inside the Kinomoto house, Sakura and Yukito crept up the stairs to check on Touya. Yukito walked a few steps behind Sakura hoping to keep his distance if Touya seemed upset with him.  
  
Sakura knocked softly on Touya's bedroom door. She waited for some sort of response from inside, but shrugged and pushed it open when she received none. Yukito frowned at the sight of Touya lying in bed. He was very pale and his rose-stained cheeks stood out in sharp contrast to the pasty white tone of the rest of his face. His breathing came in short gasps interspersed with longer attempts to take a deep breath. He was clearly struggling with it and seemed uncomfortable even lying down as he was. Yukito stepped forward and peered down at his ill friend concern and worry replacing any apprehension he had felt as he first came up the stairs.  
  
"Why don't you go get To-ya something to drink, Sakura-chan and maybe bring a bowl of water with some ice and a wash cloth."  
  
Sakura nodded and rushed out the door as Yukito grabbed the chair from Touya's desk and pulled it close to the bedside. He brought one hand up to brush across Touya's forehead, but pulled it away quickly as his friend's eyelashes fluttered slightly and then opened half-way to peer up at his visitor.  
  
"T-to-ya." Yukito stuttered nervously. He hadn't expected the other young man to wake up and now he felt like he had no right to be here offering comfort to the friend he had treated so cruelly just yesterday. Despite his inner turmoil, Yukito tried to act as nonchalant as possible. "How are you feeling?" he asked.  
  
Touya shifted slightly in the bed and tilted his head to get a better view of the figure bending over him. Dizziness made his vision blurry and the image swam before him briefly before he closed his eyes again. Yukito's name lingered on the edge of his thoughts but he couldn't force the words out of his lips before he drifted back asleep.  
  
Yukito slumped his shoulders as he watched Touya fall asleep once again. He felt disappointed and he couldn't exactly explain why. He shrugged off the feeling as Sakura came back into the room offering a tray of water and ice.  
  
"Here you go, Yukito-san. Did Oniichan wake up?" Sakura handed over the tray and walked over to stand on the other side of Touya's bed. She smoothed the covers out around her bother's shoulders with both hands and tucked them closer to his body in an effort to keep him warm. She felt like she should do something to make him feel better, but she wasn't sure she was really helping. She still wondered about what had happened last night and something about the expression on Yukito's face when she had mentioned Touya made her wonder if maybe he had something it. Even so, she couldn't think of anything that Yukito could do to make her brother this upset.  
  
She pushed away her doubts as she watched Yukito rearrange the pillows against Touya's headboard and pull him up into a sitting position. Yukito was careful to be gentle and not wake Touya up as he did so. Touya murmured something in his sleep and Yukito brought one hand up to brush the bangs away from his face as his head fell back onto the soft pillows. Yukito let his hand move down across Touya's warm cheek and linger just under his chin for a few moments in a gesture that spoke so much more than any words ever could. Sakura watched in awe at the caring tenderness Yukito displayed towards her brother and couldn't help but smile at the love they clearly had for one another. She wondered if either of them had told the other yet and sincerely hoped that they had. She was sure that they would both be happier once the truth came out.  
  
Yukito started and pulled his hand away quickly as he realized that Sakura was still standing nearby and he looked over at her his eyes filled with a combination of guilt and sorrow. He blushed at the smile she gave him and bent his head as he rested his hands in his lap once more.  
  
"It's okay, Yukito-san. I understand." She said simply and headed towards the room. "Let me know if you need anything."  
  
Yukito nodded as she shut the door. He shook his head and stared down at his hands. She didn't understand. Not really. He barely understood it himself.  
  
TBC  
  
Notes: Okay, now I know what the next chapter will be about, but I haven't finished it yet and I have lots of stuff to do tomorrow so you probably won't see it before tomorrow evening. Sorry! Thank you so much to everyone who has commented. I hope you're enjoying this so far. Everything will work out in the end - I promise!  
  
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	4. Chapter Four: Hesitation

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Look! Look! It's another chapter! It's really short, but I'll send another one right after it I promise ^_^  
  
See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such  
  
Chapter Four: Hesitation  
  
The next day at school, Touya suppressed a yawn as he watched his chemistry teacher illustrate some simple concept on the chalkboard. He was already having a hard enough time concentrating on his schoolwork and this definitely wasn't helping.  
  
Touya watched Yukito out of the corner of his eye. He was still uncertain where their relationship stood now. Yukito seemed just as cheerful as ever this morning when they had met before school and he had vague memories of his friend stopping by to check on him yesterday afternoon when he had been sick in bed, but there seemed to be something missing in their interactions now. Maybe it was that possibility that had always flitted between their words of something beyond friendship. Something beyond the simple greetings and kind gestures. Touya wasn't sure, but his heart ached at its absence. He could feel Yukito slipping away from him almost tangibly and he had no idea what to do about it, but it scared him.  
  
Touya fidgeted in his seat and stared up at the clock on the wall. He was tired and there were only a few more minutes left of the school day. He was glad to see it end despite the makeup work he still needed to complete. The sooner he could get home and be alone in the confines of his own room the better. Then he could get away from the stares of classmates who had noticed a distance between him and Yukito since that sunny afternoon that felt like ages ago. He could get away from those cheery brown eyes smiling back at him from within Yukito's familiar face that had somehow lost their familiarity over the space of less than two days. Touya didn't know how to explain it, but his confession had changed things between the two of them in more ways than he ever thought possible. They were subtle changes and that was what made all of the difference. He could have handled more abrupt changes better he thought. If Yukito had refused to speak to him or had yelled at him in anger, Touya would have known how to respond. He would have known the difference between a friendly face and an angry one. He could have pinpointed exactly where the differences lie and known for sure that every thing had changed considerably. But now things appeared almost the same as before with only very minor differences. They left him to wonder if maybe he was the one who had changed.   
  
Touya closed his textbook and shuffled his notes into a binder before packing his things into his backpack at the sound of the bell. He could feel Yukito's gaze on him as the class filed out of the room leaving only the two of them alone inside. Touya looked over at his friend and found Yukito staring at him with wide uncertain eyes. Touya frowned briefly at the sadness within them as well. He hadn't expected to see such an emotion there.  
  
"Do you want to come over to my house to study, To-ya?" Yukito asked hesitantly. He seemed to be trying his best to seem nonchalant about the question. After all, such a query would have been nonchalant only a few days ago, but now it held a much deeper significance. Going to Yukito's house to study would have been familiar and safe. It would have suggested that their friendship really hadn't changed and it could even survive something as troubling as unrequited love, but it would also gloss over the depth of the pain Touya felt at the remembrance of Yukito's denial the other day and ignore the sadness in Yukito's own gaze at the moment. It would be so easy to just move on and put that glitch behind them, but it wouldn't do justice to the closeness of their relationship or the depth of their friendship.  
  
Touya shook his head and tried his best to smile sincerely at Yukito. "Maybe some other time, Yuki. I'm pretty tired and I should get home."  
  
Yukito nodded and looked down at the floor. "I hope you feel better soon."  
  
Touya paused on his way towards the door. His eyes widened slightly at the statement and he had to remind himself that Yukito was only concerned about his physical health and not the state of his mind at the moment, but as he glanced over at his friend he wondered which way Yukito really meant it. Yukito's eyes still held the same sense of uncertainty and his lips were down turned in a small frown that didn't seem to belong on his usually cheerful face.  
  
Touya nodded in thanks and slipped out of the door before he could analyze that frown too much more. He didn't want to think about what it might mean or how it might play a role in Yukito's words outside the coffee shop. He knew it would be dangerous to assign motives and feelings to his friend when he really had no reason to believe that those words had been untrue.  
  
TBC  
  
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	5. Chapter Five: To Save A Friendship

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Here's another short chapter. Enjoy!  
  
See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such  
  
Chapter Five: To Save a Friendship  
  
It was Touya's turn to make dinner tonight. He was glad that he could busy himself with such a chore and focus on mundane tasks like chopping vegetables and stirring saucepots. He had spent most of the afternoon trying to do his homework without letting his mind wander to a certain white-haired young man who had offered to help him study. He had, of course, failed miserably at this task. Everything reminded him of Yukito and the friendship they had once shared. He hoped it had not faded away completely, but it was still difficult to determine.  
  
Touya winced as a splash of boiling water bubbled up from a nearby pot and burned his hand. He cursed and pulled his hand away immediately. He had been distracted again and it was becoming very annoying. Touya was used to being in control of his thoughts and actions almost to a fault. He didn't like the unexpectedness and uncertainty with which these new feelings seemed to arise within him. They were frightening in their intensity and difficult to push aside in favor of routine and familiarity.  
  
Touya frowned again and continued to prepare the evening's meal. He told himself that he would eventually get used to this loneliness and one of these days not too far from now he would be able to get through an evening without wondering what might have been or asking the dreaded 'what if' questions that plagued him now. One of these days he would realize that a romantic relationship with Yukito was no longer plausible and those kinds of thoughts would leave his mind. He would be able to look at Yukito in a purely platonic sense and not have to worry about trembling hands or shallow breaths in his presence. One of these days he would fall out of love he was sure and then, he would be able to look back at this whole situation with detachment and resolution.  
  
Touya set the knife aside and pushed the pile of neatly sliced vegetables to the corner of the cutting board trying very hard to ignore the stinging in his eyes as he came to those conclusions. They were painful to acknowledge though and he couldn't bring himself to believe them at the moment. He didn't want to give up. He didn't want to stop loving Yukito or get used to the loneliness he felt away from his friend. He never wanted to fall out of love with Yukito even if his friend could never love him back the way he really needed him to.  
  
Touya nodded resolutely and brought both hands up to wipe away unacknowledged tears that had somehow slipped down his cheeks. He would get through this somehow. For now, he just had to take it slowly and work on one thing at a time. Tomorrow if Yukito asked him to come over and study, he would say yes and they would spend the afternoon together as they had done before in the hopes that he could at least save a little bit of his friendship with Yukito that he treasured so much.  
  
TBC  
  
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	6. Chapter Six: A Sister's Love

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I'm going to send this out now because I happen to really like this chapter and I'm happy that I finished it tonight, but I haven't even started on the next chapter yet so it might be a while before I get anything else out.  
  
I'll dedicate this part to my own little sister who isn't really little anymore and doesn't read fan fiction, but I love her and she's cute so it works ^_^  
  
See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such  
  
Chapter Six: A Sister's Love  
  
Sakura came bounding down the stairs for dinner when her brother called her. It was just the two of them tonight, but the food smelled delicious. She smiled widely at Touya as he set the last of the dishes on the table and looked up at her.  
  
"Hi Oniichan!" Sakura greeted him gleefully. Her brother had been so melancholy since the other day that she felt the need to cheer him up. "Dinner smells really good."  
  
Touya smiled wanly at her. He knew what she was trying to do and he appreciated the effort. "Sit down and eat, kaijuu."  
  
Sakura glared at him in mock anger. "I'm not a monster!" she stated emphatically as she pulled out a chair and sat down.  
  
"Itadakimasu!" Sakura announced picking up her chopsticks and diving into the food on the plate in front of her. She glanced up at her brother warily every now and then, but she wasn't really sure what to say to him. He stared down at his plate, pushing the food around and occasionally taking a few bites. It was clear that his thoughts were somewhere else. She frowned at the dismal look on his face and decided to make it her mission as his little sister to find out what was wrong and do whatever she could to make it better.  
  
"Onnichan? What's wrong?" she asked hesitantly blinking up at him in confusion.  
  
Touya's eyes widened as he lifted his head to meet her gaze. He hadn't realized he was being so obvious. The last thing he wanted to do was to make someone else worried about him, especially Sakura. "It's nothing." Touya answered simply and continued eating.  
  
Sakura frowned and set down her chopsticks to lean forward a little in her chair. Her sparkling green eyes shown with sympathy, and her voice was steady and serious. "You can tell me anything, Oniichan."  
  
Touya stared back at her in amazement. He hadn't expected such honesty and tenderness from someone as young as Sakura, but he realized that she was growing up even if he didn't always want to admit it. This was just one more sign that the sweet innocent child he had dragged around by the hand and whispered ghost stories to in the dark was maturing into someone that he would someday hardly recognize. That thought saddened him slightly, but also made him proud. He knew she would grow into a remarkable woman that anyone would be proud and lucky to come into contact with. She had always been there for him just as much as he had been there for her and he was grateful. He figured that he at least owed her honesty in returned.  
  
Touya sighed and pushed his chair a few inches back from the table. He brought his hands up to clasp in front of him briefly as he tried to figure out where to begin. Before he could say a word, she started it for him.  
  
"Does this have anything to do with Yukito?"  
  
Touya blinked back at her once more. She was a very insightful 11-year-old to say the least. He started to wonder how much she really knew about him. "Yeah." Touya answered reluctantly.  
  
Sakura smiled in response and leaned back in her chair. "I thought so!" she announced happily and gestured for him to continue. When he didn't she creased her eyebrows in thought and tried to figure it out on her own. The only thing she could think of was that maybe Yukito had finally confessed his love for her brother and Touya had turned him down, but that didn't seem to explain Touya's sadness and she was relatively sure that her brother returned Yukito's feelings entirely. Wrapped up in thought she barely heard him let out a deep breath and search for the words.  
  
"Well… he and I… it's just that…" Touya's shoulders slumped in defeat. He had enough trouble trying to explain the situation to himself and now trying to explain it to his younger sister was proving to be next to impossible.  
  
He paused for a moment and then tried again. "I care about Yukito very much, Sakura, but we have a difference of opinion on the matter and lately we haven't really been able to get passed that." Touya stared down at his hands as he said the words and avoided looking up into his sister's gaze. He was afraid of the disapproval he might find there. After all, he didn't expect her to understand one friend's love for another let alone his own love for another man.  
  
After several silent moments, blue eyes lifted to meet green and Touya was once again surprised to see only kindness and understanding in his younger sister's face. She pushed her chair out carefully and stood to walk over to the other side of the table where he sat. She reached out and delicately placed one hand on his shoulder.  
  
"Do you love him?" she asked, her voice solemn and her gaze steady.  
  
"Yes." Touya answered breathlessly.  
  
Sakura smiled a brilliant smile and threw both arms around her brother. He froze at first not sure of what to make of such an action, but soon he found himself leaning into her embrace and welcoming the comfort and approval she offered. He felt a relief wash over him that he didn't even realize he was lacking. It meant more to him than he could express.  
  
When Sakura finally pulled away, she was surprised to see the sadness still evident on her brother's face. She saw no reason for it. Yukito loved him and he loved Yukito. It was as simple as that as far as she was concerned.  
  
"Why are you sad, Oniichan?"  
  
Touya closed his eyes at the question and fought back the flood of images that darted through his mind's eye of that sunny afternoon outside the coffee shop. He opened his eyes again and stared down at the edge of the table without really seeing it.  
  
"He doesn't feel the same way." The words were quiet and difficult for him to say, but they had a finality to them that hung in the space between the two siblings.  
  
Sakura stared back at her brother in shock. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. Of course Yukito felt the same way. He had told her that himself when she had confessed her own love for him underneath the canopy of stars at the school festival. She shook her head in disbelief and fought back tears of her own. Yukito loved her brother and she was sure of it. She couldn't understand why her brother would believe otherwise.  
  
Sakura stomped her foot on the dining room table adamantly and grabbed onto her brother's arm with both hands tugging at his sleeve to get him to look in her direction.  
  
"But he does love you! I know it!"  
  
Touya looked back at her with a sad expression dancing behind his gaze. He shook his head slowly. "No. He doesn't." The words were calm and heart wrenching at the same time as if he had thought them over for a long time and finally come to this conclusion.  
  
With that, Touya stood up and patted his sister affectionately on the head. "Thanks for trying, Sakura."  
  
Sakura watched as her brother walked away and headed upstairs to his room. His head was bent slightly and she thought she caught a glimpse of eyes too bright with tears glimmering in the warm glow of the hallway lamp.  
  
She wanted to run after him and demand an explanation or call up Yukito and ask him what was going on, but her feet were firmly planted on the ground. She could only stare after Touya helplessly and wonder how so much could have changed in the space of so little time. Only a few weeks ago, Yukito had loved her brother and she was certain of it. At that time it hadn't seemed like the kind of love that would fade away so quickly. It had seemed strong and pure and lasting. She couldn't believe that it had changed at all. Yukito loved her brother so why would he lie? Why would he make her brother so sad?  
  
She couldn't understand it at all.  
  
TBC  
  
Notes: Too sweet? I'm not sure, but I think I like it. Now on to real work - you know, the kind that gets graded and affects your entire college career… Or maybe I'll work on that next chapter just a little more ^_^ Fan fic writing is just as addictive as reading I think.  
  
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	7. Chapter Seven: Uncertainties

Okay, here's the next part as promised. I'm finally done with papers and exams. Yay!  
  
Unfortunately, I won't be anywhere near a computer for the next couple of days so I probably won't get the next chapter out until at least Sunday.  
  
Thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed and commented so far! I really appreciate it! It makes writing even more fun ^_^  
  
samuraiheart  
  
See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such  
  
Chapter Seven: Uncertainties  
  
Yukito couldn't sleep. It wasn't that he wasn't tired. He just couldn't sleep. He lay in the darkness of his room staring up at the blank ceiling in the hopes that he would eventually drift off, but so far it wasn't working.  
  
Reluctantly, Yukito sat up in bed and slipped his glasses back onto his face. If he was going to be awake, he might as well do something productive. He sat on the edge of his bed and tried to figure out what was causing his insomnia.  
  
One fuzzy image kept making its way back to the surface of his thoughts, but he didn't want to see it so he pushed it away as quickly as he could. In truth, he knew that there was only one reason that he hadn't been able to fall asleep. Every time he closed his eyes he saw Touya's dark blue eyes glistening with disappointment. He finally gave up and rested his head in his hands as the thoughts continued.  
  
He hadn't actually seen Touya upset, but he was reasonably sure that he had been and there was no mistaking the sadness that had settled over his gaze since that afternoon. Yukito had hurt him and he knew it. He had hurt the one person he had always sworn to protect no matter what. He had lied to him too and that was even worse.  
  
Yukito shook his head and leaned back against his pillow determined to control the feelings welling up inside of him. He couldn't love Touya. It didn't make any sense. How could a temporary form of anything have the feelings and emotions necessary for love? But if he wasn't capable of love like that then why did it hurt so much to turn it away?  
  
Yukito couldn't come up with a good answer to that question. Vague doubts drifted through his mind, but none of them led to the answer he was seeking. None of it was making any sense and he was finding it difficult to clamp down the emotions swirling within his thoughts.  
  
He clasped the edges of his covers between his fingers and closed his eyes in an attempt to calm himself. He didn't need this now. He was having a hard enough time trying to deal with the fact that he was actually two people. Why did Touya have to go and confess something so life-changing and complicated?  
  
Yukito knew the answer to that. It was the same reason Sakura had announced her love for him only a few weeks earlier and it was the same reason he had turned her down as gently as he possibly could. It was because he cared about her.  
  
Touya cared about him. Yukito shook his head at the thought. He didn't know what to think about that. It was the one major flaw in his plan. If Touya really loved him, then did it really matter what he was?  
  
Yukito started at the sound of the phone ringing. It was after midnight and he couldn't imagine who could possibly be calling at this hour, but he rushed to the phone and answered it as quickly as he could.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Yukito-san?" Yukito smiled at the small voice on the other line, but his eyebrows furrowed in worry about why Sakura would be calling him so late. He hoped everything was alright. His heart beat quickly in his chest. What if something had happened to Touya?  
  
"Sakura-chan! Is there something wrong?"  
  
"No. It's just that… Ummm…"  
  
"What is it, Sakura-chan?" Yukito asked hesitantly.  
  
"IneedtotalktoYue." Sakura answered breathlessly trying to get the words out as quickly as possible.  
  
Yukito barely had time to process the words before his eyes closed and he felt darkness sweep over him as his consciousness faded and Yue's form took over. Feathery white wings unfurled to reveal the long-haired guardian looking slightly annoyed at having been woken up.  
  
"I'll be right there." Yue said calmly into the receiver and placed the phone back on its cradle.  
  
He spread his wings wide once he got outside and peered out at the lights of the city sparkling in the evening as he gained height in the air. The light breeze of an early spring night swept across him as he flew blowing his silvery hair behind him in a long trail. Moonlight danced across his features making his grayish blue eyes glimmer in the darkness.  
  
It was only a short way to Sakura's and after a few minutes he caught sight of her house and started to descend towards it. Sakura stood at the open window waiting for him.  
  
Yue folded his wings inward as he stepped into Sakura's room making them disappear completely once he was all the way inside.  
  
Sakura was in her pajamas and she looked like she had been sleeping not too long ago. The covers of her bed were pulled back slightly as if she had pulled them away in a hurry once she had gotten the sudden idea to call him. He found himself smiling slightly at the thought. He liked to think that he was needed.  
  
She sat down on the edge of her bed and gestured for him to do the same. "Where's Keroberus?" Yue asked solemnly glancing around the room for some sign of the other guardian.  
  
Sakura clasped her hands in her lap and bent her head slightly. She was trying her best not to be flustered around Yue, but there was just something about him she found intimidating. "Ummm… I sent him to Tomoyo's house a little while ago. He won't be back until the morning. I wanted to talk to you alone."  
  
"Oh?" Yue turned towards his mistress in confusion. He couldn't think of any reason she would need his advice.  
  
"Yeah, it's about Yukito."  
  
"Oh." Yue nodded and frowned.  
  
"Do you know what happened with oniichan?"  
  
"Of course." Yue answered matter of factly crossing his arms in front of him and trying his best to appear as nonchalant as possible.  
  
"Right, of course." Sakura fidgeted nervously. "Why did Yukito lie?"  
  
Yue's eyes widened at the statement. He hadn't expected his mistress to be so straightforward. He paused for a moment thinking of the best way to phrase his next statement. It was a delicate issue and one he had to be very careful about. "My other form seems to think he is incapable of love." Yue shook his head and pursed his lips in disapproval.  
  
Sakura turned to him in disbelief. "But, that's not true! I know it isn't true!"  
  
Yue nodded slowly and let out a slow deep breath. "I know, but he just needs some time to realize it."  
  
Sakura nodded in response. "So there's nothing we can do?"  
  
"I don't think so. We have to let Yukito figure this out on his own."  
  
"I guess so."  
  
"Don't worry. If your brother really loves him as much as he seems to, Yukito will figure it out soon enough."  
  
"I hope so. I know oniichan loves him very much."  
  
A long moment of silence went by as Sakura bit her lip and stared at her hands and Yue mulled over the situation trying to figure out why he still felt so uneasy.  
  
"Sakura-chan?" Yue asked hesitantly.  
  
"Yes?" Sakura looked up at the guardian with wide emerald eyes surprised to see the uncertainty in his gaze.  
  
"Do you think your brother could love two people?"  
  
Sakura's eyes widened at the statement, but her expression quickly melted into a sincere smile. "I'm sure he could Yue. I'm sure."  
  
TBC  
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	8. Chapter Eight: Resolution

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Sorry for the delay, but here's the next part. I hope it turned out alright. I'll have the next part out in a few minutes and that will be it ^_^   
  
samuraiheart  
  
See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such  
  
Chapter Eight: Resolution  
  
The next day after school Yukito was careful not to meet Touya's gaze as he gathered his books in his arms and prepared to leave the classroom. He stood beside his friend's desk nervously shifting his weight from one foot to the other as Touya packed up his things and picked up his backpack.  
  
"Ano… Do you, umm, want to come over to study?" Yukito asked quietly. He was sure he knew the answer even before he asked, but he felt that he had to try. He braced himself for another negative response as he heard Touya take a sharp breath and pause before saying one way or the other.  
  
"Sure." Touya answered softly.  
  
Yukito's eyes widened at the reply and he slowly looked up to meet Touya's gaze. He saw sadness hidden within those blue eyes, but it was fading somewhat and Touya's mouth curved up into a gentle smile.  
  
Yukito returned it with a brilliant smile of his own and felt his heart beating quickly in his chest. His eyes stung slightly with unshed tears, but he blinked them back quickly before Touya could notice. It was such a relief to have things starting to get back to normal. There were times within the last few days when he wasn't sure that they ever could. At least this was a step in the right direction.  
  
Yukito assured himself that that was all he wanted. He needed Touya to be his friend again. He told himself that everything would be fine once that happened. He could handle the loneliness and uncertainty on his own if he had to, but he needed that sense of companionship that only Touya could give him. He needed the joy that flooded through him when he saw Touya crack a slight smile because of something he had said or the lightness he felt within him when Touya sat beside him or leaned closer to him to explain a difficult math problem. He was so afraid that his rejection had put an end to all those things that even this small sign that things might be headed back to the way they were was enough to make his eyes light up despite the uncertainty still at the back of his thoughts.  
  
A little while later, at Yukito's house, the two young men sat together at the dining room table with their school books spread out in front of them both staring intently at their own homework. Instead of studying together, the moment had turned more into the two of them studying alone with the other just happening to be in the same room.  
  
Yukito turned the pages of his spiral notebook nervously. He couldn't concentrate for some reason. Despite his best attempts to return everything to normal, there were still things that he couldn't quite put to rest. There were questions he needed answered and words that needed to be spoken even though he was relatively sure that they would only bring more pain. He sighed softly and ran his fingers through his hair once more.   
  
Finally giving in to his own curiosity, he set his pencil aside and rested his hands in his lap. He hesitated for a moment not sure if he should break the delicate silence between him and Touya. Yukito looked up at his friend across the table bent over slightly gazing at the pages of an open textbook before him. Touya's dark bangs fell just over his eyes and Yukito couldn't see the expression on his face.   
  
Yukito looked down at the edge of the table and then asked in a tentative voice, "How do you know?"  
  
Touya frowned and looked over at this friend in confusion. He had no idea what Yukito was talking about. "About what?"  
  
Yukito slumped his shoulders and lowered his gaze until he was staring at his own hands clasped loosely in his lap. "That you love me." Yukito answered quietly.   
  
Yukito didn't see the pained expression that flitted across Touya's face, but he heard the sharp intake of breath and the sound of Touya's pencil falling to the ground and clattering across the wooden floorboards as it rolled a few inches and came to a stop once it hit the leg of the table.  
  
He heard Touya scoot his chair back and Yukito held his breath as he waited for his friend to storm out of the room in anger or some other emotion closer to sadness, but Touya didn't move. He sat on the edge of his chair for a few long moments before forcing himself to look up at the man sitting across from him. He saw the hesitation and sadness on Yukito's face even though the light haired man wasn't looking at him. He heard the pain in his voice even though the words were over and he realized that Yukito's question was one of the easiest things he had ever been asked.  
  
Despite the sorrow born of rejection and the struggle to hide his feelings for so long, he still loved Yukito and he knew he always would. Having to tell Yukito how he knew something so self-evident was not a difficult task at all.  
  
"Yukito, your presence in my life has been like a precious gift that I never thought I deserved. I know I love you because it's the easiest thing that I've ever done. I can't help but love you because you are such an amazing person and you have always been so wonderful to me." Touya's voice wavered slightly at first as he tried to find the right words, but it gained strength and confidence as he continued. His usually quiet demeanor melted away as his eyes shone with sincerity. Touya stood up before going on and walked over to place one hand on Yukito's shoulder. "I love you because I need you and I only want to make you happy. I know I love you because your smile makes my heart soar with warmth and the sound of my name on your lips brings me more joy than I have ever known. I love you, Yukito, because you're you and I will always love you because I know that I could never stop as long as I'm here beside you."  
  
Touya knelt down closer to his friend and took a deep breath. He was searching for the words to say that he understood if Yukito didn't feel the same way. He needed to find a way to say that he would be alright even if his love was not shared. He wanted Yukito to feel loved without feeling obliged to return that love. He wanted to fix the friendship they seemed to have lost.  
  
He opened his mouth to continue, but lost the will to speak when he felt Yukito's slight shoulders shudder and he heard the aching sound of Yukito sobbing. Touya furrowed his eyebrows in concern and patted Yukito gently on the back.  
  
Yukito raised his head slightly and looked up at his dark haired friend with a gaze filled with hesitance and uncertainty. Tears streamed down both his cheeks and left pale streaks that shimmered slightly in the glowing light of the mid-afternoon sun streaming through the dining room window.   
  
"How can you-" Yukito whispered softly his voice breaking between sobs. "How can you love me when I don't even know who I am?" The words held a hint of anger, but that quickly faded away into further despair as Yukito shook his head and allowed himself to be wrapped up in Touya's outstretched arms. He clung to Touya's sturdy shoulders as he fought to regain control of his thought and emotions. Touya just held him close and stroked his soft hair tenderly as he whispered words of comfort and fought to hold back tears of his own.   
  
When Yukito finally pulled away, Touya smiled down at him with compassion and understanding. Yukito couldn't resist the sentiment and felt his own lips curve upwards in a half smile. He struggled with the next words, but knew he had to say them. "I'm sorry, To-ya."  
  
"Shhh… It's okay, Yuki."  
  
"No, really, To-ya, I've been so cruel…" Yukito shook his head as his words threatened to dissolve into tears once again. He took a deep breath and tried his best to continue as he took one of Touya's hands in his own and looked up into Touya's shimmering blue gaze. "I love you, too, To-ya. I love you very much and I'm still trying to figure this all out, but I don't want to lose you."  
  
Touya hugged Yukito once again and ran a hand up and down Yukito's back in slow comforting circles. "I love you, too, Yuki and I'll be here for you whenever you need me. No one ever expected you to do this alone. We'll figure it all out together."  
  
Yukito nodded against Touya's chest and pulled himself closer to his friend. He wrapped his fingers in the cloth of Touya's shirt and clung tightly to the one he loved the most.  
  
TBC  
  
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	9. Chapter Nine: All My Love

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This is the final chapter. Thank you so much to everyone who has commented along the way. It's been really fun and I hope you have all enjoyed it as much as I have.  
  
samuraiheart  
  
See first chapter for disclaimer, warnings & such  
  
Chapter Nine: All My Love  
  
Fujitaka stood in front of the stove and stirred the miso soup every now and then as he flipped through the day's newspaper and skimmed over the events of the past few days. It had been nearly a week since the evening he had found Touya in the rain and he still wasn't sure what had happened. He had several theories of course, but he hoped that Touya would just tell him before he had to resort to bringing any of those up.  
  
He folded the pages of the newspaper and set them aside at the sound of someone coming down the stairs. Heavy unhurried footsteps told him it was Touya and he smiled brightly at his son as Touya rounded the corner into the dining room and pulled out a chair and sat down at the table.  
  
"Good morning, 'Tousan."  
  
"Good morning, Touya-kun." Fujitaka nodded at the young man before him and leaned slightly against the counter. "Breakfast will be ready soon."  
  
"Thanks." Touya answered politely.  
  
"It's good to see you're doing better now. I guess everything worked out, ne?" Fujitaka crinkled his eyes closed as he smiled once again.  
  
Touya blinked in surprise for a moment, but soon returned his father's gaze with a smile of his own. "Was I really that bad?"  
  
Fujitaka shook his head slightly. "No, but I'm your father so I could tell."  
  
"Oh." Touya nodded at the statement and seemed satisfied with the explanation.  
  
"Touya-kun?"  
  
"'Tousan?" Touya asked at the same time.  
  
"It's okay, son. You go first." Fujitaka shook his head and gestured for Touya to continue as he pulled the breakfast dishes out of the cupboard and began to set the table.  
  
"It's just… is it okay if Yukito comes over for dinner?"   
  
"Of course." Fujitaka answered without hesitation. Touya seemed to relax slightly after that and Fujitaka wondered briefly why such a simple question would make him nervous.   
  
"Weren't you going to ask something?" Touya looked up at his father with curiosity, but Fujitaka only shook his head and brushed the question away with a wave of his hand.  
  
"It wasn't important." Fujitaka turned back towards the stove to begin cooking the eggs as Touya went upstairs to check on his sister. Fujitaka knew that there were still things his son wasn't telling him, but he was glad to see that whatever had been troubling him recently had resolved itself. He was fairly certain it had something to do with Yukito. He wasn't oblivious to their close relationship, but he also wasn't certain how far that relationship had progressed. He hoped that Touya would share such information with him whenever he was ready.  
  
----------  
  
Touya knocked softly on his sister's bedroom door. He shook his head at the muffled response he got from within and then opened the door. Sakura stood in front of her closet trying to straighten her uniform she had obviously just pulled over her head.  
  
"Oniichan! I still have time. I'm not late yet!" Sakura brushed her bangs away from her face and peered at her reflection in the mirror.  
  
Touya smiled and folded his arms across his chest as he leaned against the doorframe. "I know, kaijuu, I just wanted to thank you."  
  
Sakura glared briefly at her older brother and was about to protest the nickname when she realized what he had said. "Thank me? For what?"  
  
"For everything, Sakura, but mostly for your help with Yukito."  
  
"Did everything work out?" Sakura asked turning towards her brother once again.  
  
"It will." Touya nodded affirmatively.  
  
"I'm glad." She said smiling up at him with sincerity. She really was happy for him and pleased that things had finally worked out for the best.  
  
"Me too. Now, you'd better hurry before you're breakfast gets cold." Touya smiled after her as she rushed down the stairs towards the dining room.  
  
A happy ending after all, at least for the most part. Touya knew that there would be plenty of bumps along the way, but this was only the beginning and all he could do was give as much love as he had to those he cared about the most and hope that they all realized how much they really meant to him. His sister, his father and Yukito - all very different kinds of love, but cherished and important just the same.  
  
~Owari~ Actually, there's still an epilogue...  
  
By the way, the title is from a line in the song "Hearts in Armor" by Trisha Yearwood in case you haven't guessed already. It's a gorgeous song and I highly recommend it! 


	10. Chapter Ten: Epilogue

Well, as I was looking over the story I realized that Touya and Yukito never even kissed and I just couldn't let that happen. I also wanted to incorporate Yue more than I was able to so here is one more part that I wrote just now. Let's call it an epilogue and say it takes place a couple of weeks later.  
  
For it's Late and the Moon is High: Epilogue  
(Chapter Ten I guess ^_^)  
By samuraiheart  
  
"It's getting late, I'd better get home." Touya shuffled his papers together and started putting them back into his backpack. His father and sister would be expecting him home for dinner tonight and he didn't want to make them worry unnecessarily. He had asked Yukito if he wanted to come along, but his friend had seemed strangely distant today and he had turned him down. Touya looked over at his friend with concern one last time as he slung his bag over his shoulder and turned to go.  
  
Yukito stood leaning against his kitchen counter with a cup of lukewarm tea still in his hand. It shook slightly in his grasp as he watched Touya start to walk away. He didn't want his friend to leave, but he was having trouble convincing himself that he really wanted to go to Touya's house and have dinner. What he really wanted was to throw his arms around Touya and envelop him in a warm embrace before pressing his lips to Touya's in a passionate kiss. Instead, he gripped the handle of the ceramic cup a little more tightly in his fingers and smiled in his friend's direction.  
  
Touya hesitated for a moment at the doorway glancing back one more time at the man who he had confessed his love to only a few short weeks ago. Yukito blinked back at him, but he couldn't hold his gaze for very long. The fair-haired young man lowered his gaze briefly and when he looked back up his eyes shone with a light made Touya turn back towards him.  
  
"Stay." Yukito said softly letting that one syllable word echo within the space between them. In an instant, Touya dropped his backpack to the floor and Yukito set his teacup aside. The two young men met halfway and Touya swept Yukito up in his arms bending down to wrap his arms around the other man's shoulders. Yukito tilted his head and pressed his warm lips against Touya's waiting mouth. The dark haired young man opened his mouth slightly to deepen the kiss as Yukito snaked his arms around Touya's broad shoulders and brought one hand up to tangle in Touya's hair. Touya ran his tongue along Yukito's bottom lip and pressed it forward against slick teeth. Yukito moaned with pleasure at the sensation and reached out to taste Touya's tongue with his own. The two men pressed together moving lips across lips and wrapping arms around each other in a tumultuous expression of love and emotion held back for too long. It felt right in so many indescribable ways. It made sense in more ways than they could ever imagine. It was love and it was real and that was all that mattered.  
  
Touya pulled away from Yukito reluctantly as the light-haired young man whimpered slightly at the absence of warmth and comfort.  
  
Touya smiled hesitantly and brought one hand up to brush away a few unruly bangs from Yukito's face. "I should call home, but don't worry, I'll be right back."  
  
Touya returned to find Yue waiting for him on the couch. He didn't know what to say at first, but the sparkle in the other man's gaze was so similar to the love he had seen in Yukito's just a few minutes before that he couldn't see any reason to be afraid. He was a little nervous as he walked over and sat beside the ethereal creature though and he tried not to let it show on his face.  
  
"Don't be afraid." Yue said impassively as he leaned closer to Touya letting his long silvery hair fall across his shoulders and spill down the arm of the couch.  
  
Touya opened his mouth to respond, but closed it again when he saw the way Yue's hands shook slightly in his lap and noted the hesitance in his cat-like gaze. There was emotion there that he had not seen at first. Yue was uncertain about something and Touya had a pretty good idea that it was the same thing Yukito had been uncertain of only a few minutes before.  
  
"I'll stay." Touya answered soothingly as he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Yue's perfectly formed mouth and brought one hand up to brush away the long silky strands of Yue's hair. He marveled at the softness of Yue's warm lips and found himself deepening the kiss as he felt his heart beat quickly in his chest. There was a familiarity to the kiss that he couldn't quite identify, but he had the strangest feeling that Yukito was smiling at him throughout. When he finally pulled away he had to blink to clear away the double vision of both Yue and Yukito staring back at him expectantly. Both sets of eyes held love and passion and understanding. Touya couldn't quite make sense of it all but he knew that those same emotions must be mirrored in his own gaze. He loved Yukito and Yue because really they were both parts of the same whole. Someday the barriers would break down and they would come to realize this for themselves. Until then all he could do was shower them both with as much love as he could muster and hope that it was enough to equal the love they clearly had for him.  
  
~Owari~ Really this time ^_^ 


End file.
